Heartland Film Festival

Everyone always tells me that I only write in this thing when I am in Africa...well, that is usually true and I am not sure why. However, I have been having urges to write more...somehow an expression of myself...leaving a legacy as I live...I don't know.

This week in Indianapolis is Heartland Film Festival. It is where they show tons of independent films. My friend Amanda loves film and last year I was not able to join because I was in Africa. So, she would recount for me all the good bad and ugly films that I missed. This year, I am actually back for them. So, we have bought a package of tickets and are seeing a few.

Last night, we went to Amal. The summary by the film festival was

"Amal, a multi-layered portrait of contemporary India, follows an auto-rickshaw driver in New Delhi who is content with his small but vital role in the world around him. One day, he drives an eccentric billionaire who, disguised as a vagabond, is searching the streets for the last morsel of humanity--someone he can feel comfortable leaving his fortune to. With one passenger, Amal's life may change forever."

My friend did not think it was done well and rolled her eyes throughout the movie. Upon her further analysis, I will say that it did lack the good connection that she desperately wants to see. However, I was still struck by the movie.

I have been to India and I could just smell the landscape and feel the heat as they showed the images of the rickshaw and the the streets. However, I was struck most by the fact that this illiterate poor man was so content. Life was simple. In that life, he was content. He was presented as one of the few guys left in India who was honest and caring. He charged people fairly for his rickshaw rides...he sacrificed greatly for perfect strangers. His integrity and honesty ran very deep. I found myself wondering if the fact that he was content in life was what allowed him to treat people with such profound gentleness, kindness. He didn't need to get money out of them. He didn't need to badger. Life was ok...just as it was. Simple...poor...fine.

I often want to be simple. I go through many moments where I purge my house and my things. Trying to simplify...however, I still buy more things. I want it simple but with certain pleasures. I want to enjoy the moment I am in but struggle so hard to focus. In the shack (I think), there is a time where God says to stop worrying so much about the future it hasn't happened yet. Translation to me...worry about the future when it happens so much energy is concerned about the future or remembering the past that I miss the moment. And you never know...the future that you anticipate may never happen. Lately, when my mind starts going off in frustration or whatever related to the future I try to refocus on the moment I am in...the person I am talking to...the breeze as I sit....the joy of the routine of cleaning....and dang it...that really is a hard thing to do...who would have thought.

Home Again

The trip home went well...I slept very well on the plane from Bangui to Paris and then slept in the airport for 2 hours in Paris. I think that really helped me for the day yesterday because I didn't even get tired until 10 pm last night. Of course, I woke up at 6 am and I am slightly tired today but still overall the jet lag is really good.

The trip was really good....I have so much information and the guys were so receptive of me. On the last day, my Bangui accountant sat with me and we just chatted...no translator. So that means that we experimented with different words in Sango and English. I actually learned a few more phrases. Largely, I learned how to say I am excited to go home and see my friends and family....it was rather fun. Next time I go, I will need to think of a new question to learn other than how many children they have.

I must say that I am still amazed that they have so many children. It is cool that the families will adopt the children of siblings when they die. But when people have 6 - 10 children normallly and then they die and someone else has to adopt the 6 -10 children when they have 6 -10 children themselves...the compound factor causes rather sad situations. They don't have enough food to have more than one meal a day. Each African I talked to who had gone to America said the most annoying part of going to America was that all Americans have to eat when they get together. I talked to someone in the Paris airport and he was going to America. He said he has to try really hard to not gain too much weight because his family at home is not eating that much.

Anyway, I am home know...and enjoying friends and rest.

Hello

So, I know it has been a while. I did get to Bangui ok but the internet connection has basically been non existant because the electricity has been down so much. I probably do have many stories but ultimately I am just exhausted. I wish this didn't disrupt my energy level but oh well...it is hard work.

I am leaving tomorrow evening and will be home on Friday. I am so glad to be getting to go home...it will be nice to see people again.

I have received most of the budgets and that is very encouraging. I still have a few budgets to work through with my boss but he and I will not see each other until December so this will be large phone conversations....yeah! NOT.

Ok, I need to run to lunch but I wanted to say hi and to apologize for the lack of connection....I am doing well.

Bangui and 4 more days

So, the trip was pretty bad. We woke up at 2:45 and waited for the other car full of Africans. They didn't show up until 4. Then we began the long trek back to Bangui. The first half is the worst with the dirt roads and the large craters in the road. I tried to lay down in the back but it is impossible to sleep on that half. But I kept getting sick...so I would sit up to watch the road. Yet, my head was so heavy I could not hold it up so then I would lay back down again....I didn't sleep but I couldn't hold myself up. We drove on the bad roads for 6 hours and only went 124 miles. That means we were moving at an average of 20 miles per hour...talk about exhausting. Than we still had another 7 hours to go the remaining 248 miles on paved roads....it took a total of 13 hours. We arrived at 5 pm. Although on the second half, I was able to actually sleep a little in the back as the road is paved...it still has some large pot holes but paved all the same.

Than I hung out with the missionary couple in the compound we stay at. That was an interesting night...I was tired and I found myself bitting my tongue at a few comments. Still, it was very nice to have new people to hang with and not talk about work. We played cards and just enjoyed the company.

Today, I woke up read a book, finished most of the analysis of Bangui's financial records, and then I headed over to our second office to work on the internet. The internet at the compound with our housing and office is supposed to have internet but it isn't working. Which is kinda sad because I won't be able to connect as easily with friends and family.

The next 4 days will probably be a blur...I have a ton of meetings. I am leaving on Thursday in the evening....oh man, I am so excited to be home. I think my next trip (if I have one) will be 2 weeks. I am getting all the large stuff down and will just need check up trips which should require as much time. That will be nice.

Did I do that

So, today I have felt like I constant cultural fopah. At night I usually find my phone and put it beside my bed...a weird ritual and largely because all I have to do is push a button to see what time it is....rather than find my flashlight and shine it on the clock when I can't sleep. Well, last night I couldn't find it. Oh well, I told myself it is probably in the other house or on the porch...I will check tomorrow. Well, I wake up this morning and began looking for it. I couldn't find it. I asked Bob...he said he didn't know. So, I told him to tell Elise our house help to keep an eye out. I knew it couldn't have gotten far and it would show up sooner or later. We looked around one more time and I sat down to work. I do this all the time...no big deal...it will show up. Not so in this world, within ten minutes there was a little bit of activity going on. Next think I know Bob is asking me to get up and keep looking for a little bit and Farel my accountant pulled out his phone to call it. (I would have done that eventually). Well, we found it at the bottom of my trunk and all the guards, garden help, and house help were following me around looking very nervous. What I then realized is that we are in a secure fenced in area and their job is to make sure everything remains safe and nothing is stolen. If something turns up missing, they get extremely nervous that they will be blamed for it. So, they were pretty much freak'n out. I felt so bad...that was the last thing I was trying to do. I lose things all the time. Mental note....keep looking hard before you raise an alert with the workers of the house. Man...it was bad.

Today was the last day in Berberati...other than my big issue...nothing of large note. I had wrap up meetings with people and last minute conversations. I did have to have a heart to heart with one of my accountants but that even turned out good. Bob told me that they are not used to having people actually talk through perceived issues with them...usually it shows up in a meeting and the head person (that would be me) blows up and drops the hammer. He said that this went really well and hopefully they will take it to heart. I have no idea if they are used to people dealing with conflict the way I do...but it did end up fairly well given our cultural differences.

They guys want to leave at 3 in the morning. I think they are crazy but I am going to do it. Ugh. On the last trip, I slept the first 3 hours. I am not sure if I will be able to do that this time as the beginning of the trip is all the really really bad holes in the road. Oh well.....I can sleep on Saturday night and all day Sunday if I need to.

The good thing about Bangui is the pool should actually be working...I truly hope so. And 6 more days till I board a plane and 7 more days till I am home. I am really looking forward to getting back to comfortable friends. I don't mind the days here...it is just work. But at the close of the day, I wish I had a good friend to detox with...still overall the trip has gone smoothly.

Sunset

As the sun set tonight, I looked out to the sky and realized that the entire sky was orange. 360 degree rotation and the sky was entirely orange. It was beautiful. I went to get my camera that I haven't used yet and found that the battery was dead so too bad for everyone who wanted a picture. Still...the sunsets here are by far one of the most beautiful things...to look out over the land with the jagged trees....it is quite amazing.

Went over another budget with the Berberati administration this morning. I wasn't very impressed. They forgot numereous things, padded stuff all over the place, miscalculated...it was sad because my berberati accountant was part of the team. He does great at recording things and documenting but truly he nor the administrative head can forecast worth anything. I even have them forecast out each month of cash flow...they are never right. I have no idea how to teach them....I have tried and it doesn't appear to be sinking in. I know everyone has strengths and weaknesses but I do expect a little better in this category for accountants. Oh well, one step at a time...maybe an ah ha moment will happen. Still...they are definitely better than some of the people I worked with in the government...I probably shouldn't have said that...my old boss actually reads this :)

Other than that, I started to pull all the information for budgets I have received to date together...some things look great and other things look scary. Again, I will just have to dialogue with the Africans and see how we want to handle it. Together we will decide what we can afford and not...that part is fun to be able to give them some control...trying to find the answer with limited funds...that isn't fun.

Tomorrow is my last day in Berberati...the pool never worked and I gotten eatten alive this time...but I worked every day on a veranda and accomplished a lot...so all and all a productive two weeks. One more week and then I board a plane to come home.

Nothing Grand

Today has been pretty low key. I have worked with my accountants to discuss a few things like getting all of our accounts in line and doing better documentaion in memo lines. All that boring accounting stuff.

I walked by the pool today. It is still only half full. Three weeks of trying to fill it and only half full. I am totally positive there is a leak but oh well...there is a pool in Bangui.

Reading Friday Night Knitting Club in down times and getting eaten alive today. So, just a dull day in Africa.